The Importance of Self-Care and 5 Tips to Make Time for YOU

I used to participate in Top Ten Tuesday when I first started blogging and it was a wonderful way to meet fellow bloggers! I thought with coming back from a hiatus, and a bit of a lack of inspiration on my part, participating again would be a great idea. So, every Tuesday (if the topic interests me) I’ll be sharing a Top Ten Tuesday post. Top Ten Tuesday is hosted by The Artsy Reader Girl! Make sure to check out her page explaining everything you need to know, including future topics. 

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This week’s topic is supposed to be about 10 things that stop you from reading, but since Mother’s Day was this past Sunday, I thought I’d put a little twist on it. Look, since becoming a mom, I don’t really have 10 individual things that stop me from reading. My list would look something like this:

1. My toddler
2. My toddler
3. I’m tired
4. My toddler
5. Playdates
6. Cleaning
7. Cooking
8. My toddler
9. Mindlessly scrolling Instagram because…
10. I’m tired

Oh, and all of my other hobbies like writing a book, blogging, and playing video games that sometimes take precedence over reading when I finally have a moment to myself. I even recently picked up drawing again (very casually). So, if I barely have time to read, how do I make time for any hobbies at all? I have a few things I do to try to weasel in some time to myself when I can.

But, listen, I’m no expert. Please don’t take this post as an “I DO IT ALL” type of post because, boy, do I NOT. There are many weeks that go by where I don’t make any time at all to do any hobbies. Then there are other weeks where I find the stamina to do at least some things I enjoy. Regardless, I wanted to share with you some things I implement in my life to give myself a little TLC. But first…

This section might be silly, but I think we have all been guilty of thinking taking time for ourselves, self-care, or even the simple act of reading when our to-do list is a mile long is a selfish thing. I’m here to say…maybe it is a little…but that’s not a bad thing! Taking the time to nurture yourself is beneficial for many reasons. I’m sure there are lots of lists out there, but here are my specific reasons for always trying to make time for me:

1. HOW I FEEL ABOUT MYSELF (or yourself) matters. It matters if you wake up in the morning proud of what you have accomplished and what you have yet to accomplish – in every area in your life.
2. THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU will benefit if you’re happy. I can’t be the best mom I can be if I’m not taking care of myself first, physically and mentally.
3. THE FUTURE won’t be how it is in the present. Duh, right? Yet, sometimes we can get so lost in the present that we forget that there is a whole future ahead. My son won’t be three-years-old forever. One day, he’ll be in his 20’s, hopefully on his own building his own life, away from his childhood home. If I don’t nurture myself now, then when he doesn’t need me to take care of him anymore, I would have to start from scratch. I need to nurture myself now so that in the future I have already built a solid foundation to enjoy my retirement age.

Pretty straight forward, right? I know it’s a lot easier said than done. So, lets jump right into my tips…

» WAKE UP SUPER EARLY «

Sorry, friends, I know this one is hard to hear. But y’all need to go to bed early and wake up early. This may not apply to you depending on where you are in your life, but if you have kids: wake. up. before. them.

Get that workout in, have that cup of coffee, check your planner, and enjoy the sweet silent bliss of the day before anyone else wakes up.

The morning hours are my most productive, so I put it to good use. I wake up between 4 – 5am most days. I get a 20-minute workout in, set up a morning activity for my son for when he wakes up (hoping it entertains him for just a smidge longer so I can get breakfast going), then get to work. Whether that’s working on my book, or writing a blog post (like this one, it is 6am as I’m writing this), reading a few pages of a book, or even prepping my Instagram post – I get most of that done before my son wakes up.

But let’s say you’re not a mom, if your schedule allows, still wake up early! Give yourself 30 minutes to an hour before you have to get ready, before your to-do list, before you have to write an essay, to make time for yourself! Can’t do 30 minutes? Do 5. I promise you, you’ll feel so much better.

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» SCHEDULE IT INTO YOUR WEEK «

I know this sometimes takes the fun out of things and makes it feel like a chore but schedule your hobbies into your week! If you can’t do them in the morning before you start your day, find a time that works for you and schedule it. Put it in your planner, set an alarm on your phone, let your friends and family know that this is you time and you’re busy, damn it.

To help me get more writing time in, I recently started implementing a 20-minute focus time in the evening after dinner is all cleaned up. I put some focus music on, turn notifications off, tell my husband and son that it is now focus time. I’ve been able to write roughly 500 words in my WIP every time I do this. There’s something about that timed writing session that makes me more productive than an open-ended free-for-all.

I also make Fridays my “self-care” day. It’s the day I do face masks, pluck my eyebrows, paint my nails, basically whatever I feel like doing in my “beauty” regimen.

You can make the schedule work for anything you want, just pick a time for whatever activity you want to do, and commit!

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» EMBRACE THE SCREENS «

This tip is specific to moms, and moms who aren’t against their kids using screens. To those of you who avoid screens with your kids, honestly, I admire you. I don’t know how you do it. But if you’re a mom who uses screens, then keep reading.

EMBRACE THEM. Don’t feel bad. Don’t judge yourself. Use them as a tool to help you.

If I need some time to get something done, and that includes blogging (and other hobbies), and I feel a cartoon will help me accomplish that without distractions, the tv goes on. I am not ashamed to admit that. Screens can be used as a tool to benefit mom. It’s not like I let him sit there for 12 hours doing nothing (although we have had some very lazy days where we binge watch movies together), but if I need an hour to get something done and he will not play independently – cartoons ftw. Also, my son is already becoming a little movie buff, which I ain’t mad about. I love me a good movie day.

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» USE THE NOTES «

This isn’t exactly a tip that makes more time for yourself immediately, but Future You™ will thank you for doing this. Which means you’ll be more efficient. Which means you’ll have more time for yourself.

The tip? Whatever notes app you have on your phone, or if you prefer carrying around a notebook with you, use that sucker. Personally, I used the iPhone notes app for a while, but I didn’t like that you couldn’t sync it elsewhere (at least, not to my not-super-tech-savvy knowledge). I’ve recently switched to Microsoft OneNotes because I can use it on my phone AND my laptop. There are lots of options out there but my biggest tip for this: just use something that you are comfortable with and that syncs across devices. Once you find that service…

Use it like you have the memory of Dory from Finding Nemo. You’re getting ready for bed and get an idea, write it down. You have a cool dream, write it down. You remember something random you need to get done, write it down. You have thoughts about the book you’re currently reading, write it down. You think of 1000 things you need to get done, write all of them down.

Simply put: Write. Everything. Down.

Whether its digitally or not, it doesn’t matter, just put it somewhere you’ll remember to look. It will help you when you finally go to write that blog post you’ve been thinking about, or want to remember your thoughts on a book, or remembered there was definitely something you were supposed to do but cannot remember what that specific task was. We like to tell ourselves we’ll remember, but we probably won’t.

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» I DON’T «

Not every day, week, or month is a win for our hobbies (or self-care) – but they might be wins for quality time with our family, productivity in our work life, or crunch time for finals – there will always be another time to devote to your own interests. Remember when I said earlier that Fridays is my self-care day? Yeah, it’s usually my self-care day. Unfortunately, I haven’t made the time to do any pampering for at least a month. But that’s okay.

Make time for yourself, except when you don’t, because sometimes you won’t. (Dr. Suess anyone?)

So don’t let the fact that you haven’t read a book in a month get you down, try to look at what you have accomplished (even if that thing is finally binge watching all of the Lord of the Rings extended editions back to back like you’ve been trying to do for the last year ahem me ahem).

How do you make time for yourself? What are some hobbies you wish you spent more time on? Are you guilty of putting everyone else first before yourself?